I don’t even know what happened this week. I think the dog ate my homework. And then something must have eaten the dog because I don’t have one of those either.
It was no secret that I was bored with this one before I even began. Didn’t I come up with my own resolutions? Yes, I did. (Thanks for asking!) Apparently I thought I needed to throw in some vague, run-of-the-mill resolutions, or maybe I just had trouble coming up with 52 of them? I don’t remember. But I didn’t like this one. Having a bad attitude about completing a resolution is probably not the best way to start off any week, but when it’s the week that your goal is to Think Positively….yeah. It didn’t go well.
My main problem this week is that I’ve gotten used to FUN resolutions where I get to DO something (like use lots of CAPITAL LETTERS). I’ve really enjoyed most of those, and it’s helped me to complete a lot of projects or things I’ve been wanting to try. So when I learned that all I had to do was think positively, I was a bit unenthusiastic. Which is sort of the opposite of positive.
But then a friend of mine sent me The Joy Dare and I was motivated again. I liked the idea of “searching” for things throughout the day and it gave me something to DO again. I picked all non-religious challenges, but you could do it either way. Basically it’s somewhat like a gratitude list where you try to recognize “gifts” in your daily life. How is that for positive?
I didn’t go by the calendar, I just randomly chose a few that interested me, so on Day 1 my goal was to find 3 gifts on paper. That was the day I got my electric bill in the mail. Not much of a gift, but imagine living without it?! I also received a great thank you note from a high school friend’s mother whose 60th birthday party I had attended recently. I get sort of unnaturally excited to get mail in the first place, so when it’s something nice like that, I certainly appreciate it. My last “gift” was sort of a non-gift. I had gone to check my mailbox at work (where mail is NOT fun) and….there was nothing in it!! I know they were supposed to be on paper, but this lack of paper was joyous as well. For any coworkers reading this, let’s keep that one going.
My 2nd day I was to find 3 gifts in conversation. Here’s where I started going downhill. I felt like I was trying to force something into a conversation so that I could say it was meaningful. And then I forgot to pay attention to conversations until I was home alone at night. At that point it was either talk to the cats, or call someone on the phone. I hate talking on the phone so my cats got an earful that night, but I’m afraid none of it was very meaningful.
My 3rd day? It was pretty much the same as my 4th, 5th, 6th, and 7th days, except on the 3rd day is when the actual giving up occurred. I sort of resigned myself to taking a week off and trying not to feel guilty about it. Because being guilty is not positive.
The thing is, I’m not really a negative person. I know some of you may disagree, but I see myself as more of a crotchety old woman who knows what she likes and doesn’t like. I also am extremely fluent in sarcasm and that may come across as negative sometimes, but all-in-all I know I have a good life and I am thankful for that. I look forward to a lot of things and I enjoy many things. So maybe this week was difficult because nothing negative happened for me to think positively about?
And hey, that’s positive, right?